On good days I wake up without remembering that we live in a world with three Transformers movies, and a fourth on the way. Those days are far and few between now, it seems. Poppa says that we have to always keep the hope, and protect the fire. Sometimes I just don’t know if it’s worth it anymore.

Cinematic chaos god Michael Bay has won the tax incentives to film the latest epic of CGI action figure-smashing in Detroit, as he did with the first and third installments (Little-known true fact: the second was shot in Hell. Yes, Hell). Along with this news, a plot synopsis for the film has dropped:

As humanity picks up the pieces following the conclusion of Transformers: Dark of the Moon, Autobots and Decepticons have all but vanished from the face of the planet. However, a group of powerful, ingenious businessman and scientists attempt to learn from past Transformer incursions and push the boundaries of technology beyond what they can control, all while an ancient, powerful Transformer menace sets Earth in his crosshairs. The epic adventure and battle between good and evil, freedom and enslavement ensues.

Just when you thought we were safe, now people are building Transformers. The beast will be unbound June 27th, 2014. That’s how long you have to find shelter – and pray.

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